I'm still alive!

Hi all. I'm back in the swing of things and ready to blog again. Please know I have been keeping updated on reading all your blogs. I mentioned in my last post that I was taking a beat from blogging due to a "rough patch". Well let me elaborate...it was nothing to do with babies or anything like that. You might remember me mentioning that Brad recently finished his study and qualified as a driving instructor and was going for a job at a driving school. Well it was a long interview process. Parts of it were formal face to face interview and other parts of it were like "auditions" out on the road where he would take lessons and be graded. Well a few weeks ago we were told that he had been successful and he had gotten the position at the school. I am so proud of him because not to brag but it is the most well known driving school in the state and very hard to get a position there. And my hubby managed to do it fresh out of school. So why have I been going through a tough time you ask?

Well since the miscarriage you also might remember I had some trouble with anxiety? It has settled down a lot since but unfortunately it reared its ugly head again during this period I guess because of all the stress involved when your husband is changing his career. I haven't been sleeping well and then have been having to get out of bed and be a mum to Nickie which is hard to do on no sleep. That consequently has been making me more stressed and it has become a vicious cycle. Because Brad is going to be essentially self employed (the school will be contracting him to work on their behalf and he will be paying them a commision) there have been a lot of start up costs which have got me stressing about our finances. We have had to buy a car and get it fitted out with dual control pedals and pay for insurance. On top of that I have been worrying about what if he doesn't get enough work to pay for the repayments on the car and the commision payments to the school? Also the position the school is offering him is for over the other side of town. We have always planned on moving to a bigger house someday as the house we are in is quite pokey but I never planned on moving so far away so that has been upsetting me too. Brad says don't worry about that now as if I really don't want to move he is happy to commute and if I do want to move well it will be another year or two away till he is more set up anyway. Easier said than done though when you are a worrywart like me.

Anyway just wanted to let you all know I am completely ok, just a little frazzled. Hopefully I'll be a better blogger from now on. And thanks to those that commented and emailled to wish me well. You guys are the best.